Widowhood Is Not Funny

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Starting Over

Time to start again, it seems. My daughter has moved away from home, to be with her husband, who's in the army and stationed many miles from here. I miss her terribly, but we both have our own lives to live now, separately. I had hoped she would live close by and I'd see her occasionally; she wasn't supposed to move so far away. She phones me now and then, and sends texts each night, saying she loves me and misses me, which is nice, but not the same as having her nearby.

I've moved too, into my own small place. It's the first time I've ever lived alone and it's exciting and scary, all at the same time. It's very quiet, which as a writer, I appreciate a lot. I sit here at my computer, pecking away on my latest assignment, lost in my own little world. I love being able to work at home, where it's peaceful and quiet. When it gets a little too quiet, I go visit with friends, go to my club meetings and enjoy the comraderie and laughter.

So, I have a new life, a new career, and new friends. Like anyone, there are times I love it and times I hate it, but mostly it's good. When I feel down about being alone, I remind myself that change is good and inevitable, it seems. I've stopped trying to bring back what was normal, whatever that is nowadays, and try to embrace the changes in my life. The bad news is I have to be alone now, but the good news is I have new opportunities and new ways to bring my dreams to fruition. I've posted before about not getting stuck in grief and hiding in one's home, avoiding life. We have to get on with things, with life; life goes on and we have to go with it.

Those of you out there who read my blog, and thank you, btw, will notice a change in attitude. It's taken a while, but I've finally reached acceptance, that last stage of grief. Sometimes, you feel as if it will never happen, how could you accept the loss? But you do, you have to, eventually. That's when you know you're ready to start over. It happens at different times, for different women, but it happens and when it does for you, don't feel guilty. You can't hold onto the grief forever; your husband wouldn't want you to anyway.

Reach out and embrace your new life, make it a good one. Starting over is scary, but exciting too. I hope you'll post here and let me know how you're doing, how you're moving on and starting over. I'd love to hear your stories. Talk to me, I'm listening!

1 Comments:

  • At 2:01 PM, Blogger Chatty Lady said…

    Interesting blog, it truly shows what happens to some when we are suddenly alone. I understand as having had the same situation myself. As I said on Boomer Women Speak, it takes time to adjust but adjust we will.

     

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