Widowhood Is Not Funny

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

How Long Will This Last?

This is a question that is constantly on your mind, during any stage of grieving you might be going through. The grieving remains, it's the intensity that changes. In the beginning, the grief is so intense, you're sure you won't make it, they'll be burying you next. The sadness is so overwhelming, it's difficult to breathe some days. Focusing on each moment, each minute task is the only way to get through each day. You look forward to sleep, just so you'll be unconscious and can stop thinking for a few hours. You don't want to think about the next day and the next, or the next week, month or, Heaven help you, next year, without your life partner. You know eventually you'll have to face it all, but please God, just not now! It's tempting to want to stay in that numbness forever, but your logical mind reminds you it's just not possible, or even desirable. The only way to get through the grief is to face it head-on and work past the pain and anguish,

I cannot tell you exactly how long it will last. Each woman is different, her grief is different, and the way she has to work through it is different. It's similar to being in a swimming pool for the first time. You're afraid of the deep end and hesitant to get in it, so you edge your way around the pool, stepping carefully, testing the depth, gathering your courage, making sure you can breathe, until you're brave enough to let go of the side and swim out by yourself.

But fear not! As in a swimming pool, you're not alone. Just as there are lifeguards to keep you safe at the pool, so here in the world of widows, there are also friends you can depend on to help you through the deep end of your grief and out the other side safely.

If you feel you're in over your head when it comes to your grief, remember, you're not alone. There are a great many of us widows and we have to help and support one another. Talk to us here and we'll get your through.

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